21 Aug 2013
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A lot of my readers have asked me the same question….”How do you know if you’re in a relationship for keeps or a “just for fun” relationship….So here goes….Here’s what I think!!
If this man/woman is the real deal he will pass all the “red flag” test that you throw at him. 1st and foremost you have to establish boundaries or rules for yourself when dating and seeking that “forever” relationship. For instance, from the beginning… KNOW exactly what you are looking for in a relationship. KNOW what you will compromise and what you WON’T…example: if you have a need that a guy picks you up for a date….then start out saying from the beginning…” I don’t drive to dates”
The easiest way I have found is to write out a list of qualities in a person that I require them to have.
In my days of Soul Searching, each person I entered a relationship had some of the qualities that I adored but I never took in to consideration the qualities that I “dislike”….these are called “RED FLAGS”.
When I began dating again I wrote out my list, I looked back at all the relationships and wrote down all their qualities and put them into “adore” and “red flag” categories.
For instance: I have a huge RED FLAG if I start to FEEL that a guy only comes around for sex, if he only texts you and never calls, if he doesn’t spend quality time with you WITHOUT sex. “MAJOR RED FLAG”
Everyone has flaws, but in my own protection mode, if a guy gets three red flags….no use going any further in the relationship because you will end up attached and he will just move on to the next.
Now some of my readers asked me to relate this to them being “THE OTHER WOMAN” in a relationship.
Here is my advice….IF he is married….RUN RUN RUN….RED FLAG…..
IF he is in a relationship but it is finished except for the “business part”…the part where they have to divide their belongings and find other shelter accommodations….this should be a RED FLAG as well. It may very well be over in their mind but let’s face it…if one person wants out and the other person doesn’t…the one that doesn’t will pull every tactic from “I can’t live without you to….pulling out SEX moves …to using the kids or having sick relatives”…trust me I’ve heard it all!!
If you have been seeing this guys for a couple of months and he still hasn’t made any progress in LEAVING…..RED FLAG
Trust me….it doesn’t take that long to make up your mind on whether to stay or go…maybe if kids are involved or your name is on the mortgage but if there is really no ties that bind you except for a memory of “WHAT WAS”….then there is NO REASON to stay…..that my friends is a huge RED FLAG.
IF you are mixed up in this triangle and this guy has his own mind believing he is doing things slowly as to not “hurt” the so called soon to be “ex” and wants to “part as friends”….RUN RUN RUN….RED FLAG….
Here’s why: IF his relationship is truly OVER….then YOU’RE FEELINGS WOULD MATTER AS MUCH AS THE EX’S!!! If he barely spends time with YOU….but goes out to eat with her…the soon to be ex….WHY?
If he comes running to you for sex but can’t pick up the phone to call you or come over and just watch a movie or take YOU out to eat…..RUN RUN RUN….RED FLAG!!
I say this because what you are doing is filling his “EMPTY” need that is lacking at “HOME”. I said HOME…HIS HOME…THE ONE HE DOESN’T PLAN ON LEAVING…..WHY SHOULD HE?…..he has everything HE wants out of this relationship….SEX with YOU….and “comfort” of NOT having to start OVER with HER.
You want to know for sure if he’s “INTO” you as a person, as a “Love Interest” and not just for “SEX”…….MOST (I say Most) men are DETAILED orientated….they remember small details, your hands, your smell, your hair, your eyes, yes your cleavage….but if a guy is really into you, he goes a step further…he remembers your birthday…your favorite flower…your favorite color…etc…….he will pick this up from just “Listening and observing you”….he will KNOW this WITHOUT you telling him or it ever being discussed.
If you’re GUT feeling is telling you that YOU are just his “JUST FOR FUN” on the side….you probably ARE. Because if a person doesn’t like their circumstances then they change their circumstances…if they aren’t willing to do something about their circumstances and they say “let destiny take its course”….GET OUT!!….it’s not YOUR journey to travel with him….he may seem perfect for you but he is NOT….if HE were…HE WOULDN’T BE THERE…..HE would be with YOU!!
Learn to KNOW yourself…TRUST your gut instinct….if you are FEELING 2nd best or like a 2nd choice or a backup plan…..Honey….YOU ARE!!
You can’t blame this on him either….he has treated you… the exact way YOU have allowed him too!! That is why it is so important for you to set up boundaries and rules and a “RED FLAG LIST”
Know what you WANT out of a relationship before you jump right in….YOU are a TREASURE and don’t just give your TREASURE away…make him WORK FOR IT!!
Love yourself first….by setting boundaries and rules and a “RED FLAG LIST”….you can rest assured that your heart will open up to the RIGHT GUY AT THE RIGHT TIME…..it may not happen overnight or within a year…but being single doesn’t have to mean being lonely….being single and being happy is the fastest way to finding true love.
It’s taken me 4 years to finding ME again….the man that gets my heart WILL have to jump through fire to get it and keep it….I know what I want in a relationship…I know how I want to be treated…I know what I will compromise and what I won’t…..Mr. Right will find me one day…and if he doesn’t that is ok too…I have finally found peace within myself and that for me is TRUE LOVE♥
13 Feb 2013
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13 Feb 2013
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13 Feb 2013
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Often times I am asked about my Love Life and my thoughts on heartbreak…Today…I’m going to give you what I think…take it or leave it….they are my thoughts…my views…my opinions on the subject…be they right or be they wrong….they are mine and I own them!!
Breaking up is a natural evolution…when you are trying to figure out what you want in life. If you are with an individual who isn’t moving in the same direction and at the same rate that you are…it just isn’t going to work!!
The loss of love is not nearly as painful as our resistance to accepting it. I was never one to patiently pick up broken fragments and glue them together again and then tell myself that the mended whole was as good as the new. What is broken is BROKEN and I’d rather remember it as it WAS at its BEST…than MEND it and see the BROKEN pieces as long as I lived…Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it’s better to leave them broken than try to hurt yourself putting them back together….Those who do not know how to WEEP with their whole heart….they do not know how to laugh and love either.
Love begins with a smile, grows with a kiss and ends with a teardrop….Never regret…if its good, it’s wonderful…if it’s bad…it’s experience…when one door closes another door opens; but we often look too long and sooo regretfully upon the closed door, that we just don’t see the one that has opened up before us…I HAVE NO REGRETS IN MY LIFE…..I think and believe everything happens for a reason. The hard times that you go through in life build character, making you a much stronger person…..Love grows by giving…The love we give away is the only love we keep…the only way to retain love is to give it away. Love is an expansion of two natures in such fashion that each include the other, each is enriched by the other….It takes only a couple of seconds to say “HELLO”, but it takes forever to say “GOODBYE”
Relationships can be like cheese and hard to snap, the longer you stay in a dissatisfying relationship, the more the cheese will melt and hence become harder to snap! Hence there is no point in continuing the relationship when you know it’s not going to work out…right?
I believe you meet people for a reason…for a lesson so to speak. They come in to your life and teach you something about yourself; whether it is positive or negative…you learned something from them and when the lesson is finished…it is just best to end.
So heartbreak is a chance to rediscover yourself. A chance to rediscover your inner strength, it’s an opportunity to grow and love yourself all over again. Trust me…it’s a trip to realize what I am made of and then use it to the fullest extent….I’m always going to stay positive…it’s just my nature!!
I am a beautiful flower (my daddy always said that)…and just like a beautiful flower needs water and sunlight to grow….so does a relationship in which it needs to be valued and nurtured so that it enriches your life…not make you crazy!! It requires respect…if you don’t respect a person you wouldn’t notice their good qualities. Respect is not only one of the most important values in a relationship, but a fundamental truth in any relationship…you simply cannot expect anyone to respect you or your point of view, if you would not do the same for them.
Love is a feeling that cannot be manufactured, if it’s there……IT’S THERE!! If it’s not, then you can’t do anything about it…you can’t make a person LOVE you…Relationships aren’t supposed to make you cry and sometimes we try so hard to hold on to something that ended so very long ago that we end up losing our balance in life.
Life is all about BALANCE….
Peace and Love,
17 Jan 2013
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Tags: aviation, comedy, country, divorce, entertainment, facebook, google, heartbreak, humor, love, men, msn, reddit, relationship, Relationships, Sel-Help, Self-Esteem, self-worth, stumbledupon, twitter, videogames, women, yahoo
17 Jan 2013
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Tags: aviation, dating, divorce, facebook, google, heartbreak, love, men, msn, Relationships, self-help, videogames, women, yahoo
Ever wake- up in the morning thinking you were living someone else’s life? It has been said “The greatest thing you can be proud of is being able to stand from a fall and becoming a better person”
You know that one feeling, that helpless “feeling” when you’re just “waiting” endlessly. Waiting to get home, run into your room, close the door, fall into bed, and just shut everything out that you kept in all day, that nasty “feeling” of both relief and desperation? Nothing is wrong, but nothing is right either, and you’re tired, tired of everything, tired of nothing, and you just want someone to be there and tell you it’s okay, but no one’s going to be there, and you know you have to be strong for yourself, because no one can fix you. But you’re tired of waiting, tired of having to be the one to fix yourself and everyone else, tired of being strong, and for once, you just want it to be easy, to be simple, to be helped, to be saved, but you know you won’t be, but you’re still hoping and you’re still wishing and you’re still staying strong and fighting with tears in your eyes. You’re fighting. You are fighting for YOU….you are fighting to find YOURSELF.
Somewhere at some point in your life, you went down a wrong road, took a wrong turn if you will. Now comes the road before you, it has twists and turns and roadblocks and yield signs. Sometimes you might find detours and no outlet signs but guess what? You’re on the Right Road….the Road to YOU…new and improved version!! Finding yourself begins with dissecting your previous relationships and to clean out all your excess emotional baggage.
On my journey to finding ME, I have learned that before you can truly grow up, you must first fall in love three times. First, you must fall in love with your best friend, ruining or at least tarnishing the friendship forever. This will teach you who your true friends are and to define the fine line between friendship and Something More…
Second, you must fall in love with someone you believe to be perfect. The lesson from this will be that you will find that NO ONE is perfect and that you should never be treated as anything LESS than you deserve.
Lastly, you must fall in love with someone who is exactly like YOU. This will teach you about WHO you are and what you want to be. So when you have went through all that…you learn that the people who care about you the most are the ones that you hurt. The ones that hurt you are the ones that needed you most. In the end you will discover that love is only a concept and it is not something that can be defined. It means something different to each and every person that walks the earth. So, with that being said, understand and know that everyone wants to be loved.
Remember when you were a little a kid and fairy tales were as true as the day is long? When the fantasy of your life was a white dress, Prince Charming and a castle on the hill. You had complete and utter faith that when you opened your eyes after going to bed at night, the dream was REAL. Eventually, you grow up, open your eyes and the fairy tale disappears.
The problem is that most people turn to the things and people they can trust. Truth is though, it’s hard to let go of that fairy tale entirely cause almost everyone has the smallest bit of hope, of faith, that one day, they will open their eyes and it will come true. That your Prince will come and carry you away to that castle on the hill.
At one point In your life you may love the wrong person or maybe cry for the wrong reason, but one thing is for sure…..Those heartbreaking mistakes help us find the RIGHT person. It’s easy to forget how perfectly life works out. When you are down and out with the “woe is me” mentality, you believe that things never work in your favor. However, in reality if you look back, you see that, in many cases, things happened exactly the way they needed to and most often better than you would have ever dreamed.
Once I realized that I was holding on to something that didn’t exist anymore, that the person I “missed”, didn’t exist anymore. I had to realize that people CHANGE, that the things we like or dislike also change and that no matter how hard I wished, life just goes wrong. After a while, you learn that you don’t need anyone else in order to survive. No one is ever going to always be there, no matter what they say or what they promise. You just gotta put your big girl panties on, suck it up, accept it, and keep searching for your Something More♥
Love sucks and not all kisses are magical and most men/women do not live up to your expectations. But there are those few magical moments in time when everything, I mean love and relationships, it all falls together perfectly and it’s incredible. It’s those moments, no matter how depressingly few and far between, that make LOVE worth the pain of it all.
My greatest achievement in life thus far has been to overcome the fear of LOVE itself. Love, with all its forms is the best gift. Love enriches the lives of both the giver and the receiver. There are so many people in the world with no love in their lives for the mere fact that they state they are too picky or that they haven’t found the right person yet. Others complain about their own inadequacies, thus feeling that they are undeserving of love. These people are all trying to rationalize a basic fear each of us share.
The fear of rejection. We fear that by showing our love, we will risk a painful ego-damaging denial. Love is not something that needs to be returned. It is not something that can be refused. If love exists, then it exists. There is no reason to believe that we are only good people if those we love also love us back. The trouble is that most of us have been practicing holding our love back for so long, that we believe there will be one person out there that we can love and so that person had better love us, or we will be forever unloved. If we were to change our thinking, we might see the lie that we have been chained to for so long.
What if you learn that you need love? Then, in a blink, you don’t have it. What if you don’t like it? What if you lean on it? What if you shape your life around it? Then suddenly it falls apart. Can you even survive that kind of pain? Losing love is like organ damage. It’s like dying a horrific death. The only difference is, death ends…. This? This heartbreak, this pain that goes deep into my being and fills my soul with despair, It could go on forever.
Look around you and see all of the people in your life worthy of love. You should be free to care for these people. Show your feelings through words and actions. Perhaps, through your courage, they will find the strength within themselves to escape their own cage. But even if they don’t, you will feel free. You will have let go of one of life’s most powerful fears and it will make you free.
The important thing is not to be bitter over life’s disappointments. Learn to let go of the past and recognize that everyday won’t be sunny. So when you find yourself lost in the darkness and despair, remember it’s only in the black of the night, that you can see the stars, and those stars will lead you back home. So don’t be afraid to make mistakes, to stumble, to fall, because most of the time, the greatest rewards come from doing the things that scare you the most. Maybe you’ll get everything you ever could have imagined. Who knows where life will take you? The road is long and in the end, the journey is the destination to Something More♥…..
PEACE AND LOVE
06 Nov 2012
in ask, country, country music, dating, dating tips, ESPN, facebook, football, google, men, msn, News , Entertainment , Music , Self-Help , Women , Comedy, PATRIOTS, relationships, sarcasm, stumble upon, twitter, Uncategorized, wealth, women, yahoo
Tags: comedy, country, dating, divorce, entertainment, facebook, google, humor, men, msn, news, reddit, relationship, relationship advice, sarcasm, Self-Esteem, self-help, self-worth, stumbledupon, twitter, Uncategorized, women, wordpress, yahoo
What is Love? Everybody is in search of it, everybody wants it, everybody gives it such high expectations but does anybody know the real meaning of LOVE?
Many believe love is a sensation that magically generates when Mr. or Ms. Right appears. Seriously, No wonder so many people are single! Just Sayin’♥
When I asked several people to explain what Love means, on average the same reply….” Love is that feeling you get when you meet the right person.”
I thought to myself “Oyo…I’m going to be single the rest of my life”
People think that Love is this magical feeling or sensation based on physical and emotional attraction, some going through their entire lives “searching” for this magical feeling. Then feeling deprived and short changed when they never find it. Ultimately feeling that they just don’t have that emotion or even capable of love. This is how so many approaches a relationship, consciously or unconsciously…the kicker though with this approach is just as easily as their so called “magic feeling” appears, it starts to degenerate and then the “magic” just isn’t there anymore…Hence the line “you fall in love” and “you fall out of love”.
That my dear friend is called PASSIVITY…
I remember reading “The Art of Loving” by Erich Fromm, in his famous treatise, he noted the sad consequence of this misconception: “There is hardly any activity, any enterprise, which started with such tremendous hopes and expectations, and yet, which FAILS so regularly, as LOVE”
He could not have been sooo right!!… So what is LOVE ― real, lasting love?
Love is the attachment that results from deeply appreciating another’s GOODNESS.
Don’t let the word “goodness” surprise you…Society never features a couple in most love stories enraptured in each other’s ethics…”ooohhh I’m captivated by your values” “and I’ve never met a man with such morals!”….That’s not selling any books or movies!! Funny thing is…it is exactly the reason how and why LOVE LASTS.
See….What we value MOST in others…is exactly what we VALUE most in ourselves…
We were created by God to see ourselves as GOOD….Why do think you have that need to either rationalize or regret your wrongdoings??…. So, in turn, we seek goodness in others. Nice looks, an engaging personality, intelligence, and talent (all of which count for something) may attract you, but GOODNESS is what moves you to LOVE.
Love is a Choice…Love is Active…
Love comes from appreciating goodness….. Just focus on the good in another person (and everyone has some). If you can do this easily, you’ll love easily. But seeing the goodness is only the beginning.
Actions affect feelings….How can you deepen your love for someone? By doing what you were created to do….Be compassionate, by giving, the best way to FEEL loving is to BE loving and that means giving!! Think about this….Think about a time that you gave your girl or guy a surprise or did something special for them….that is the feeling of LOVE!! You did it just because….you did it without expecting anything in return…When you did it, YOU felt as good as the person you gave it too!!
Silly people, Giving LEADS to LOVE!!!
True giving demonstrates CARE, an active concern for the other person’s life and growth. Responding to his or her expressed or unexpressed needs especially emotional needs. It requires RESPECT, the ability to see a person for who they are, to be aware of their unique individuality and wanting that person to grow and unfold JUST as he or she is….But the most important depends upon knowledge, you can care for, respond to, and respect another only as deeply as you KNOW him or her…
The MORE you GIVE…The MORE you LOVE!!
The effects of genuine, other-oriented giving are profound. It allows you into another person’s world and opens you up to perceiving his or her goodness. At the same time, it means investing part of yourself in the other, enabling you to love this person as you love yourself…..So very HARD for so MANY of us!!
So many people feel that intensity of great affection boosted by chemistry and anticipation and commonality that they marry on a whim. Although they may be seeds of love, they have yet to sprout. Because deep, intimate LOVE emanates from knowledge and giving. Love doesn’t come overnight but over time. The more the couples give and give to each other the more their love will grow.
You can only ever do three things in a relationship, especially when relationships have ups and downs. So when the downs are really low, you can leave, or stay in a loveless relationship, or choose to love your mate.
LOVE IS A BEHAVIOR……not a magical “FEELING”!!!!! A relationship thrives when the couples are committed to BEHAVING lovingly through continual, unconditional GIVING. Not only saying “I Love You”….But SHOWING it!!!
Peace and Love,
04 Nov 2012
in ask, country, country music, dating, dating tips, ESPN, facebook, football, google, humor, linkedin, men, msn, News , Entertainment , Music , Self-Help , Women , Comedy, relationships, sarcasm, stumble upon, twitter, wealth, women, yahoo
Tags: comedy, country, dating, divorce, entertainment, facebook, google, humor, men, msn, news, reddit, relationship, relationship advice, sarcasm, Self-Esteem, self-help, self-worth, stumbledupon, stumbleupon, twitter, Uncategorized, women, wordpress, yahoo
Let’s talk about Emotionally Unavailable Men…….
Do we women really ever listen to our inner self when we go after these men….These “Emotionally Unavailable” men? Then when “These” men aren’t there for us, we somehow turn it around to “What is wrong with us”……STOP IT NOW!!! It is not US!!
Fact is, these men, Have NEVER said they want a relationship or even hint as such. Here is the deal, Women tend to have selective hearing and interpret everything the man says based on what a woman wants. So when we don’t listen to our gut, what do you think happens? We tend to jump into this relationship so fast that it makes it hard to get out when you know you should!! The kicker is though…..It’s not a REAL relationship….maybe to you (the woman) but to the man….it’s simply called dating!! NO EXCLUSIVITY, NO COMMITMENT….just Wham Bam Thank You MA’AM!!
If suddenly your guy seems to disappear, becomes hot or cold or his words and actions are just plain confusing or maybe he just flakes all together, maybe just maybe, YOU haven’t been truly listening to him. A man will DIRECTLY say it to you, at some point he might have said “he’s not looking for a relationship.” Ladies, men typically mean what they say and say what they mean.
These types of men are just afraid of losing their freedom and becoming lost in the relationship. They might really want to connect with someone, but truth is, they are just too afraid to start anything because they really aren’t ready!! Trust me, you’re not that amazing to him that he will just instantaneously “CHANGE” and become your perfect mate. It rarely ever happens, if ever!
Another really amazing clue is emotionally unavailable men come on STRONG in the beginning. They love the chase, and they chase hard but once you start responding positively, ta da….he stops calling or texting!! I like to call this the yo-yo effect, just like a yo yo, the relationship is up and down ….he calls…he texts….he pursues….then you start calling…texting…asking him to do things…he starts disappearing. This guy is only in it for the win….once he won you over…he is GONE!! Serious RED FLAG ladies!!!
If the man you’re dating is sending out mixed signals or his words just don’t match his actions…Hello….another RED FLAG!! If you’ve hit that place in your life where you’re ready for a relationship and you’re settling for this type of relation with an emotionally unavailable man, you are only selling yourself short of a REAL relationship. You deserve a whole, healthy and satisfying relationship with a man that meets all your needs not just some. So if you’re dating this guy whose actions aren’t matching up to his words, then you’re just settling. You deserve to have appropriate expectations in a REAL relationship not just some and it is your personal responsibility to make sure all your needs is met.
DON’T SETTLE FOR ANY RELATIONSHIP JUST BECAUSE YOU WANT TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP……THAT IS THE BOTTOM LINE LADIES!!!
The one thing that has truly help me since becoming divorced is, I sat down one night and made a list of all the important things to me in a relationship. What was I truly looking for in a relationship, what would I put up with and most important, what I WOULD NOT put up with. When you have true intentions and defined dating goals, it will become a lot harder for these emotionally unavailable men to slip through the cracks. Don’t be afraid to voice what you want and show Mr. Potential you aren’t afraid to ask for it. Not only will you show this guy your confident and feminine but IF he is MR. POTENTIAL, he’ll be open to talk about your needs and wants and if he is NOT…well MR. Emotionally Unavailable…he is going to BOLT, saving you time and energy to attract Mr. Right.
Let’s face it…if a man is ready for a relationship….he is not going to give you a disappearing act.
Sherry’s Advice: Listen to your gut….Set your rules…Follow your own rules…and take it one date at a time!! Never settle for just half your needs being met, and always remember….YOU ARE WORTH IT AND YOU DESERVE TO HAVE THE RELATIONSHIP YOU WANT!!!
Peace and Love,
20 Sep 2012
in ask, country, country music, dating, dating tips, men, msn, News , Entertainment , Music , Self-Help , Women , Comedy, sarcasm, stumble upon, twitter, women, yahoo
Tags: comedy, country, dating, entertainment, facebook, google, humor, men, Self-Esteem, self-help, self-worth, stumbleupon, twitter
14 Sep 2012
in ask, country, country music, dating, dating tips, ESPN, facebook, football, google, humor, linkedin, men, msn, News , Entertainment , Music , Self-Help , Women , Comedy, relationships, sarcasm, stumble upon, superbowl, twitter, Uncategorized, wealth, women, yahoo
Tags: comedy, country, dating, divorce, facebook, google, humor, men, msn, news, reddit, relationship, relationship advice, sarcasm, Sel-Help, Self-Esteem, self-help, stumbledupon, twitter, women, yahoo
What makes a Woman TICK??…A dear male friend of mine recently ask me this question and well Maybe I should put my thought out there to give you guys a little insight on WOMEN….Most of you are LACKING insight with this specific area… lol…(joking guys)…… so here goes….
I feel the basics needs are the same for MOST women….To FEEL Loved…Needed…Wanted…Security…Honor…Respect…TRUST….Who doesn’t want that? But what makes this woman tick? I feel that each woman has their own “Idea” of their perfect mate….So guys…find out what she’s looking for in a man….that’s your first CLUE!!
I know what I’m looking for in a MAN….I’m a romantic by nature…it’s not my fault …I’m a LEO…..I Love the romance…the chase…IF….BIG IF….you should happen to catch me and the romance starts to fizzle….well you know what is gonna happen…..This LEO will be on the prowell again…I can’t stop it…you can’t stop it….. So Romance….BIG FACTOR for me….Woman loved to be ADORED…especially ME…..I want to KNOW without a shadow of a doubt that YOU ADORE me…that you think about me…that you want me…So guys….text or call for no reason but to let us know we crossed your mind….that is all we women really want…..But you MEN…. Make it sound like we are asking for marriage!! NOT….it is just nice to know that as much as WE think about YOU (and we do a lot)….That you in return are thinking just as MUCH if not MORE about us….That’s your 2nd CLUE.
CLUE no# 3…..Confidence…..Now I’m not talking an arrogant ASS…Not that USELESS Bravado you men TRY to portray…cause trust me…WE see right threw YOU…Not any of the Macho Heroics but a truly confident man. Confidence is an attitude thing….WE woman want to know that when things get tough…YOU CAN HANDLE IT…without doubt, or fear…That you can protect us, provide for us, LOVE US.
Confidence to us means….”I’m going to TRY my BEST and I will deal with it…Somehow”….Sure there will be times that you will fail….but guys…NEVER loose the confidence in yourself….if you do…you pretty much LOST the gal!! You have got to be able to show this woman that you have an attitude that can meet every life challenge…you can’t fake that with money or looks or even possessions….Only with CONFIDENCE can you truly win her RESPECT.
I’m probably gonna step on some women’s toes with this statement but growing up in the Bible Belt…I feel it is right in sayin….CLUE no# 4…..RESPECT…….Respect means something different for men and women…for MEN….they define respect as …we women are to go along with any descison they make for they are the head of the household. Even if it’s wrong…they still have make that desion. Now women today…we may shut our mouth with silence or shoot out some criticism…WRONG….Women… are you tearing him down or building him up? Our words as woman are often motivated or withheld because of our emotions. Are you a woman who criticizes, contradicts or even sneers at your signifigant other….Do you poke fun of his abilities or lack there of or the way he may do things? Do you cut him down in front of the kids? Friends? But yet you are continuously BITCHING that HE doesn’t RESPECT YOU……HELLO…….Why should he???
On the same token….MEN…Do you RESPECT your Signifigant Other? What does RESPECT mean to Women…simply this….to consider worthy…to regard with honor….to also regard with SPECIAL ATTENTION to deem and to care for…..Simple right?
Both Men and Women require RESPECT from each other…..The clue….Learn Respect…♥
The MOST important quality I seek in a MAN….Is his ability to TOUCH my SOUL…in order for a man to get THAT close to my heart…He has to be able to show me he is TRUSTWORTHY…awww….that word TRUST……the key factor in any relationship….are you trustworthy? If I give you my heart which has been battered and bruised over the course of time but still manages to function full force…can I TRUST you to care for it? IF…and I repeat IF…I let my guard down to you and confide in you my deepest thoughts and emotions and share with you my fears, hopes and aspirations……Can I TRUST you to NOT use them against me…to not HURT me…to not BREAK an already BROKEN heart….TRUST….What does that mean?
Trust to ME…. means KNOWING that your partner would NEVER do anything to DECEIVE you…The MOST important aspect of a relationship. Knowing that your partner will be FAITHFUL and LOYAL to you. When you love and feel loved, you know that person will NEVER hurt you intentionally, they will never betray you, will remain faithful to you, is there when you need them, in return you are always there for that person, you have a special bond that helps create that trust and you cherish it and never take it for granted, EVER.
Now for the LAST clue this woman is gonna reveal to you guys is simply this…..PERSONALITY!!! As my friend has said…..”father time creeps up on you”….He is totally right….Looks fade….Bodies ware out….All you have left if PERSONALITY….so if you got though all these years on looks alone….well you’re in for a rude awakening….FATHER TIME forgets NO ONE…Find someone whom your compadable with…someone you enjoy talking with…spending time with….someone you can confide in…Someone who will lift you UP and not bring you DOWN….Someone you want to share every thought or moment of your day with…Someone who won’t point out all your flaws (you are well aware of)…Someone who won’t judge you…Someone who can joke around and not take thing soooo SERIOUS….Find someone who can make you SMILE…Just Because…..All of these qualities are very hard to find in ONE man…but IF you’re lucky….You will run across just that MAN!! He is out there looking for YOU!! Just Sayin’♥
So men…develop your personality and keep it…Father Time…He is Coming for YOU!!! Just Sayin’♥
That is all this chick has for tonight!!
Peace and Love