Ever wake- up in the morning thinking you were living someone else’s life? It has been said “The greatest thing you can be proud of is being able to stand from a fall and becoming a better person”
You know that one feeling, that helpless “feeling” when you’re just “waiting” endlessly. Waiting to get home, run into your room, close the door, fall into bed, and just shut everything out that you kept in all day, that nasty “feeling” of both relief and desperation? Nothing is wrong, but nothing is right either, and you’re tired, tired of everything, tired of nothing, and you just want someone to be there and tell you it’s okay, but no one’s going to be there, and you know you have to be strong for yourself, because no one can fix you. But you’re tired of waiting, tired of having to be the one to fix yourself and everyone else, tired of being strong, and for once, you just want it to be easy, to be simple, to be helped, to be saved, but you know you won’t be, but you’re still hoping and you’re still wishing and you’re still staying strong and fighting with tears in your eyes. You’re fighting. You are fighting for YOU….you are fighting to find YOURSELF.
Somewhere at some point in your life, you went down a wrong road, took a wrong turn if you will. Now comes the road before you, it has twists and turns and roadblocks and yield signs. Sometimes you might find detours and no outlet signs but guess what? You’re on the Right Road….the Road to YOU…new and improved version!! Finding yourself begins with dissecting your previous relationships and to clean out all your excess emotional baggage.
On my journey to finding ME, I have learned that before you can truly grow up, you must first fall in love three times. First, you must fall in love with your best friend, ruining or at least tarnishing the friendship forever. This will teach you who your true friends are and to define the fine line between friendship and Something More…
Second, you must fall in love with someone you believe to be perfect. The lesson from this will be that you will find that NO ONE is perfect and that you should never be treated as anything LESS than you deserve.
Lastly, you must fall in love with someone who is exactly like YOU. This will teach you about WHO you are and what you want to be. So when you have went through all that…you learn that the people who care about you the most are the ones that you hurt. The ones that hurt you are the ones that needed you most. In the end you will discover that love is only a concept and it is not something that can be defined. It means something different to each and every person that walks the earth. So, with that being said, understand and know that everyone wants to be loved.
Remember when you were a little a kid and fairy tales were as true as the day is long? When the fantasy of your life was a white dress, Prince Charming and a castle on the hill. You had complete and utter faith that when you opened your eyes after going to bed at night, the dream was REAL. Eventually, you grow up, open your eyes and the fairy tale disappears.
The problem is that most people turn to the things and people they can trust. Truth is though, it’s hard to let go of that fairy tale entirely cause almost everyone has the smallest bit of hope, of faith, that one day, they will open their eyes and it will come true. That your Prince will come and carry you away to that castle on the hill.
At one point In your life you may love the wrong person or maybe cry for the wrong reason, but one thing is for sure…..Those heartbreaking mistakes help us find the RIGHT person. It’s easy to forget how perfectly life works out. When you are down and out with the “woe is me” mentality, you believe that things never work in your favor. However, in reality if you look back, you see that, in many cases, things happened exactly the way they needed to and most often better than you would have ever dreamed.
Once I realized that I was holding on to something that didn’t exist anymore, that the person I “missed”, didn’t exist anymore. I had to realize that people CHANGE, that the things we like or dislike also change and that no matter how hard I wished, life just goes wrong. After a while, you learn that you don’t need anyone else in order to survive. No one is ever going to always be there, no matter what they say or what they promise. You just gotta put your big girl panties on, suck it up, accept it, and keep searching for your Something More♥
Love sucks and not all kisses are magical and most men/women do not live up to your expectations. But there are those few magical moments in time when everything, I mean love and relationships, it all falls together perfectly and it’s incredible. It’s those moments, no matter how depressingly few and far between, that make LOVE worth the pain of it all.
My greatest achievement in life thus far has been to overcome the fear of LOVE itself. Love, with all its forms is the best gift. Love enriches the lives of both the giver and the receiver. There are so many people in the world with no love in their lives for the mere fact that they state they are too picky or that they haven’t found the right person yet. Others complain about their own inadequacies, thus feeling that they are undeserving of love. These people are all trying to rationalize a basic fear each of us share.
The fear of rejection. We fear that by showing our love, we will risk a painful ego-damaging denial. Love is not something that needs to be returned. It is not something that can be refused. If love exists, then it exists. There is no reason to believe that we are only good people if those we love also love us back. The trouble is that most of us have been practicing holding our love back for so long, that we believe there will be one person out there that we can love and so that person had better love us, or we will be forever unloved. If we were to change our thinking, we might see the lie that we have been chained to for so long.
What if you learn that you need love? Then, in a blink, you don’t have it. What if you don’t like it? What if you lean on it? What if you shape your life around it? Then suddenly it falls apart. Can you even survive that kind of pain? Losing love is like organ damage. It’s like dying a horrific death. The only difference is, death ends…. This? This heartbreak, this pain that goes deep into my being and fills my soul with despair, It could go on forever.
Look around you and see all of the people in your life worthy of love. You should be free to care for these people. Show your feelings through words and actions. Perhaps, through your courage, they will find the strength within themselves to escape their own cage. But even if they don’t, you will feel free. You will have let go of one of life’s most powerful fears and it will make you free.
The important thing is not to be bitter over life’s disappointments. Learn to let go of the past and recognize that everyday won’t be sunny. So when you find yourself lost in the darkness and despair, remember it’s only in the black of the night, that you can see the stars, and those stars will lead you back home. So don’t be afraid to make mistakes, to stumble, to fall, because most of the time, the greatest rewards come from doing the things that scare you the most. Maybe you’ll get everything you ever could have imagined. Who knows where life will take you? The road is long and in the end, the journey is the destination to Something More♥…..
PEACE AND LOVE